Jenn tells me there WILL be a sixth anniversary

Union Square, San Francisco. This was the location of last weekend's getaway. My parents agreed to watch the Bubba (not that we had to twist their arms) while we were away. They were at our house at 8:00am on Saturday morning so Jenn and I could get an early start. The Bubba knew something was up, so my mom took him outside to distract him while Jenn and I drove away. Our first stop was the Starbucks one-eighth of a mile from our home. So far, so good. It was strange to drive and drink coffee, without noise and distraction coming from the back seat. My beloved bean never tasted so good. After driving in silence for a few minutes, I asked Jenn, "So...what are we supposed to talk about?" Normally, every conversation is in the form of a desperate cry for help. You know, like, "Quick, throw me a towel. Bubba just threw his water on the floor." We hadn't had an adult conversation with each other for some time, so it took us a while to get reacquainted. I almost reverted to sign language and baby talk a few times, but I caught myself. (I'll tell you this now, Bubba did great the entire weekend. He never cried for us, mostly because my parents kept him very busy. Thanks Nana and Pops!)

We arrived in San Francisco around 1:00pm, and dumped our bags at the hotel. Knowing that we had a time frame, we went in knowing exactly which stores we wanted to hit. Namely, H&M and Diesel. There are about four hundred H&M stores in SF, so we first visited the store closest to our hotel...which had only women's clothing. Jenn thought it would be best to find a co-ed H&M to maximize our shopping time...so, off we went. We shopped at various establishments until about 5pm, at which time we headed back to our hotel to shower and change for dinner. Oh, and I spent more on clothes than Jenn did. Strike one for Travis.

Before I go on, let me bestow some wisdom on all y'all guys out there. The best time to make dinner reservations for your fifth anniversary at a popular restaurant in San Francisco on a Saturday night is NOT on the way into town. Turns out San Francisco is fairly popular on the weekends. Who knew? Strike two. 

The restaurant told us that even though they were fully booked, we could come down and take our chances at the wine bar, which serves the full menu, but is first come first serve. We showed up, and by the grace of the good Lord Jesus Christ, from whom all blessings flow and marriages are secured, we only waited five minutes before we were seated at the bar to enjoy a meal together. Dinner was amazing! Seriously, some of the best food we've ever had.

After dinner, we took a cab to the Mark Hopkins InterContinental for dessert and drinks at Top of the Mark, a world famous bar on the 19th floor of the Mark Hopkins Hotel. It was packed, but we managed to get a table (again, I had failed to make reservations). We had an amazing view of the city, and it was here that we decided to open our cards. My card said something to the effect of, "I really like you a lot." It was special. I opened Jenn's card, which was titled, "My Rock." It was then that I realized I was completely screwed. Inside the card Jenn wrote, "I always want to be supportive of your dreams. So, I got you a little something to help you on your path to becoming a GREAT writer. Hope you like it!" Inside the card was a folded up note that said, "Open after reading card." I unfolded the note and the only thing on the blank page was a photo of this...

Strike three.

Yup. My wife bought me a MacBook for our 5th anniversary. How cool is she! To say that this gift is above and beyond is an understatement. I've wanted a laptop for quite a while, but never pulled the trigger. My hope is that a laptop will give me more flexibility to write throughout the day. You know...when I'm supposed to be working. I would love to post more, as well as continue working on a few projects that I started but never finished (a short story and an essay on Death and Christianity).

So not only does this woman work ten times harder than me EVERY day....she also gives me this amazing gift, even when I completely blow it. Jenn never ceases to amaze me. She gives so much of herself to the Bubba and I, knowingly sacrificing time she so desperately needs for herself. The woman is a miracle.

The audience participation part, aside from publicly humiliating me (which is encouraged), is for all you married folks to tell us how many years you and your spouse will celebrate this year. Go.

And I was all...And She was like...

She was all, "Let's not buy each other presents for our 5th wedding anniversary." And I was like, "Okay."

(Don't fall for it guys. It does not mean what you think it means.)

...more to come.

So You Don't Miss Us

We would hate for you to miss us while we are on our trip. SO, I am leaving you with some videos of London. Sure to make you smile. The first is our weekly outburst of excitement when the garbage man comes. The second is a jam session with London and his friend Eden. And the last is a nightly ritual of Hide and Seek.


Lovin' the Garbage Man from Jenn Avila on Vimeo.




Jam session from Jenn Avila on Vimeo.



Peek a Boo 1 from Jenn Avila on Vimeo.

Autumn on the Central Coast of California

It's been 75 degrees here for the past eight months, but Autumn is on it's way. How do I know? Because it was 73 degrees today. It's freaking freezing Mr. Biggglesworth. Winter is easily my favorite time of year. Well, Christmas specifically...but I love the cold, crisp days of winter. Wanna know what else I love...

Pumpkin Spice Lattes from Starbucks

Normally, I'm a Red Eye (coffee with a shot of espresso) kind of guy. I don't take cream or sugar in my coffee. I want nothing to distract me from the sweet fruit of the Spirit that is the beloved coffee bean. But Pumpkin Spice Lattes are an exception. I am all about those things. Oh, and Mulled Cider candles...I'm all about those too.

Anyone else out there in the infinite abyss that is my readership that loves fall/winter? What do you love most about this time of year?

-Trav

Social Dilemma #7

Global warming and Social Dilemma #7 are the two major issues of our time. And while I still need a few more weeks to solve the polar icecap "issue," I believe that I've got Social Dilemma #7 in the bag. This social dilemma is found everywhere, but is totally avoidable...just like mayonnaise. What is #7? Glad you asked. Okay...you're walking towards someone and you're about about ten yards away. All of the sudden, you both panic because there is a serious chance of collision. Then you do that weird, "which way ya goin" dance and you both look like complete losers. Eventually, you pick a course that avoids bodily contact, because that would be totally humiliating.

I've fallen victim to this dilemma many a time, but it recently dawned on me...why don't we just follow the rules of traffic? You know, default right. If you and I are walking towards each other and I don't want to run right into you, because you would feel like you just ran into a brick wall...just go right. If we both go right, there is no chance of collision, and you won't have the humiliation of a 63 pound dude knocking you to the ground.

This seems like a REALLY simple solution. Am I missing something?

-Trav

Mondays Stink

I know Trav usually does this really funny post on Monday's about "who had the worst Monday..." . Well, today Trav is really sick and has been sleeping for two hours. So I guess I kinda have to do it. I think, personally, that being really sick wins the cake. I also think, being the woman in a house with two sick boys, is a close second.

Being the amazing wife that I am :), I ran out to the store with Bubba in tow, to get ingredients to make my sick hubby homemade chicken noodle soup. Of course, he slept right through lunch, so I guess I really didn't have to rush. This weekend is our 5th anniversary and we are leaving Bubba behind (yikes!) and heading to San Fran for 2 days. I am praying that Trav is better by then and that I don't get it before then. Care to join me in that prayer?

So I guess this is the part where I ask who else had a bad Monday, and then I pick a winner. Go for it?

PS- Congrats to all my friends that are growing babies right now!!!! I think you are crazy.

London wasn't too sick to enjoy and ice-cream date with his
friend Isabella. She even brought him a cookie monster
bib to wear. So cute!

Wimpy, Wimpy, Wimpy

Okay, I might not look that bad. But I feel that bad. Some of you may be wondering, but are just too afraid to ask. How did that 100 push-up challenge turn out? Well, let me tell you. After 5 weeks of grueling push-ups coinciding with beach boot camp, I hurt my shoulder pretty bad. I couldn't lift my arm above my head, and I couldn't turn my head. AT all. So I decided I should probably take a break from the push ups. I took a week off and waited for my shoulder to feel better. Because after all, I refused to do "girly" push ups. Stubborn I guess.

Well, I started on week 6 last week. Needless to say, my final test was not what was expected.

73.

In case you are bad at math, that is 27 push ups shy of my goal. What a bummer. I thought about suing the person who convinced me that I would be able to accomplish this feat on the grounds that they made me defeated and worthless. But my friend told me it would never fly in court.

So all I am left to wonder is: If I hadn't hurt my shoulder, could I have done more?

The question will haunt me for the rest of my life. (or at least until I try again next week.)

Jenn

Lake County in a Nutshell

In case you were wondering, I wanted to give you all a quick summary of our trip to Jenn's hometown. Her cousin was getting married, which was the main reason for the trip, but we wanted to take a few days before and after the wedding to visit with her family. I'll break it down by day.

Friday: Travel day. Lake County is seven hours away, so we were nervous about traveling with the Bubba. We went in with an ideal scenario, which involved the Bubba going 2.5 hours with the help of books, videos, etc., then sleeping for two hours, and somehow finishing the final leg of the trip by the grace of God. I must say, the Bubba did fantastic. Exactly as we had hoped. We arrived at Jenn's parent's house and got to relax a bit.

Saturday: First off...the all important trip to the local coffee house. This has been a tradition of the Hook family since the birth of the coffee bean. I knew that I could not marry into a family that didn't believe in the necessity of coffee as it relates to salvation...and the Hook family does not dissapoint. Jenn's parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles all convene at Studebakers in downtown Kelseyville and chat a bit. It is a wonderful tradition, and one that I look forward to with every trip. At lunch, Jenn went with her beautiful mother, Karen, to have a lunch with Karen's sisters at the airport restaurant. After the Bubba's nap, Jenn's father, Jerry, and I took the Bubba to the airport to meet up with them. Kelseyville is a very small town, so we were able to walk right onto the tarmac and let Bubba see the airplanes up close. We hit the jackpot, in that about six airplanes and one helicopter took off right in front of us! The rest of the day was spent watching the Bubba play outside.

Sunday: The day of the wedding. We left early because this sexy architect I know told us that we had to visit the Hotel Healdsburg, which is in...uh...Healdsburg, the destination of the wedding. The hotel was incredible. Super contemporary and right next to the town plaza. If you're ever in Sonoma County, THIS is the place to stay.

The wedding was beautiful. It was held in a vineyard, owned by a friend of the groom. Doesn't get much better than that! The Bubba did wonderfully at the wedding, but fell asleep on the way home, which screwed up his schedule a bit.

Monday: Hang out day. I woke up, got dressed, grabbed my coffee and sat at the kitchen table. I noticed something laying on the table. It was a large paper, mostly black and white, and it was folded in half. It contained what looked like local news stories, the weather forecast...all in different sections of the paper. Jenn's father told me that it was called a "Newspaper." It was sort of like an RSS Reader, but with all the information in different sections of the paper. Apparently, these "newspapers" are fairly popular and are produced all over the world. My own experience, however, wasn't great. The ink got all over my fingers, and it was really awkward to hold. Plus, you had to keep flipping the pages back and forth. The worst part was that you'd start reading a story on the front page, and then it told you that it was continued on page B-9...which didn't even exist. Unfortunately, I don't think the "newspaper" idea will ever take off.

The rest of the day was spent letting Bubba run around their property. He went swimming at Jenn's aunts house, ran around naked, and went for wagon rides. He and I even "hunted" some quail and jackrabbits in Jenn's parent's vineyard.

Tuesday: Travel day. The Bubba did great on the trip home as well. Feels good to be back, although I love visiting with Jenn's family. I've been blessed to have the best in-laws on the planet. They are incredibly generous and a blast to be around. My only wish is that we lived a little closer, which is an uncommon wish for one's in-laws, I know. But it just goes to show you how amazing they are.

Well, that's it. All-in-all, it was a great visit and a good break from work. Your turn. When was the last vacation you took? Where did you go?

-Trav

iWoman

Remember this?

Well, I'm sad to say...it happened again. Different patient, same problem.

I call the patient's wife to tell her that I'll be there in twenty minutes to see her husband. She says okay, no problem. Twenty minutes later, I'm at their home. The patient greets me at the door and invites me in. His wife meets us inside a few moments later. After answering a few questions, the wife says, "I'm sorry, you'll have to excuse my confusion." I ask her, "Oh? Why is that?" She explains, "Well, I was expecting a woman." (At this point, I know our encounter isn't going to end well) I looked at her, obviously concerned and asked her why she was expecting a woman. She said, "When the woman called, she said that she would be here in twenty minutes. Then, twenty minutes later, you showed up." I told her, "That was me who called earlier." She insisted, "Oh no...it was definitely a woman." "No, trust me...I called you" "Well then who was the woman who called twenty minutes ago!?"

Un-be-lievable

Flexing

I'll post more about our trip to Lake County soon, but I had to get this posted before I went to bed. London has this thing he does. We'll ask him to flex and he will grit his teeth together, put his arms at his sides with his fists out and say, "Grrrrr." Well, one night at Jenn's parent's house, he was going for it 110%. Hysterical...



-Trav

A Case of the Mondays

Skylana just reminded me that I hadn't done a case of the Mondays today. My bad. We're still in Northern California and it escaped me. My Monday wasn't half bad actually. Great breakfast from Mimi, coffee, parks, rabbit hunting, movies, really bad gas, miniature snakes...you know, typical Monday. We're leaving tomorrow morning, so once we get home and settled, you should expect more posting. But we've got a seven hour drive first...so pray for us!

Let's hear it. Anyone have a particularly gruesome Monday, so despicable that it warrants the prestigious, "Worst Case of the Mondays?"

-Trav

I Did Something Manly Today

I only mention it because my life is actually very sissy. I ride a motorcycle...which is purple. I can manage 63 push ups...but my wife can do 65. I'm stylish and urbane...despite the fact that I've got the body of a 14 year old girl with clicky shoes. And I've been on more dates with men in the past month than I have been on with my wife in the last two years. Now, I know you're all thinking, "Dude, you're really messed up." And you're right, except that today I did something manly and totally redeemed myself.

It started with my wife calling to tell me that she was stuck in a parking lot with the Bubba and the car wouldn't start. She was all, "Can you help me here?" and I was all like, "Hang on a minute, I'm getting a Starbucks" and her brain was all, "Why did you marry this guy?" and she was all, "Not sure" and I was like, "Okay...got my Frapuccino...where u at?" and she was all "Longs parking lot. What should I do? and I was like, "slurp. uh. slurp. hmmm. slurp." and she like, totally took over and was all, "Just meet me here. I'm calling AAA." and I was like, "Sweet."

(Chicks man. Totally helpless. Think about it. Without my man-knowledge, my wife and the Bubba would still be stranded in the parking lot, and this Martini would be SO much harder to enjoy right now.)

Jenn called me as I was on my way to rescue her, and told me that the AAA guy jumped her and I was all like, "Oh no he di-n't, that son of a...." (I was shaking my head and snapping my finger back and forth and stuff) But it turns out that if your battery is dead, another car can connect their battery to yours via cables and make your car battery come alive for a while. It's called "jumping." File that under, "good to know." So Jenn drove home and waited for me to save the day.

On my way home, I stopped at the car store and told them that I needed a battery. They were all like, "For what car?" I could tell that they totally thought I wouldn't know because when I walked in, my shoes were clicking and stuff. But I like, TOTALLY proved them wrong. I was all like, "2002 Hyundai Santa Fe." And I just looked the guy right in the eyes when I said it too. Just to intimidate him. He said, "Okay, we've got that" and I was all, "That's right you do."

When I got home I popped the hood and took out the old battery and replaced it with the new one. And that's for real. I used wrenches. Minor sulfuric acid burns. But I got all greasy and dirty WHILE wearing my dress shirt and clicky shoes. How's that for dichotomy?

Side note: Like Jenn mentioned in the earlier post, we're leaving tomorrow morning for Northern California. Not sure how much posting will be going on in the next five days. Depends on how much stupid stuff I do while we're up there with my in-laws. If you've been following this blog for any length of time, you'll know the chances are pretty good.

Toodles.

For Real?

I have been absent from the blog lately. No real reason, just not much to say. I finish my boot camp this week, and the push up challenge test is looming over me. We are leaving out of town this weekend to travel to see Mimi and Daddad...an unusually long drive but crossing our fingers that Bubba will do well.

I wasn't going to blog anything before we left, but then I read this.
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. I can't believe that making millions of dollars for throwing around and catching a ball isn't enough for this guy. He has to change his name? To Ocho Cinco? Maybe it is because he is so dumb that it is the only way he could remember what his number is. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE FOOTBALL. Ask my hubby....it is the only reason I caved into getting cable a few years ago. It is my favorite sport to watch. But this is a joke. Guys like that shouldn't be paid to play. It makes me want to throw peanuts at him. Can we say conceited?

On a more positive note, I wanted to share my favorite saying that Bubba had this week. His new favorite word is "hot". He says it about everything. This conversation took place in the kitchen a few days ago.

Bubba: HOT
Trav: I know, Daddy's coffee is hot.
Bubba: Shaking his head.."HOT"
Trav: Is your breakfast hot?
Bubba: HOT
Trav: What is hot Bubba?
Bubba: POINTS TO MOMMA----"HOT"

yes! I'll take it!

Jenn

The 2% Rule

An architect, a Brit and an oxygen salesman walk into a bar...

I had a man date last night with this guy and this guy. Two super smart guys....and me. I thought about picking up a copy of War and Peace and setting it on the table next to me, you know...for the intimidation factor. Unfortunately, I didn't have time, so I had to find another way to "idiot-proof" myself, which is a losing battle. My game plan was to give them the old "smile and nod" trick...making them think that I knew what they were talking about. Every now and then I would throw in phrases like, "Oh, so true" and "Hmmm....yes" just to keep myself in the conversation. But I was secretly praying to God that they would ask me what noise a cow makes. That's a question I know the answer to!

We talked quite a lot about our respective businesses and careers. One thought that emerged from our discussion was that most jobs are 2% passion. Meaning that you are only doing something that you are passionate about and enjoy, 2% of the time. (We only used 2% as an arbitrary number for the purposes of our discussion. The number could be much higher in actuality, but you get the point) It brought up questions like, "Can you find the 2%?" and "Is the 2% worth the 98%?" Springing off of those discussions, we talked about what it means to be considered a success in life, as it relates to your career. We all agreed that a successful career is one that provides for your family. But what if you choose not to pursue something that would provide for your family AND be something that you are more passionate about? We agreed that not taking the chance, due to fear of failure or laziness or whatever else it could be...would be a failure.

In the end, none of us decided to quit our jobs, which is probably for the best at this point. But it was an enlightening, and entertaining, discussion. So now I'll ask you. Have you found the 2% in what you are doing? Is it worth the 98%? (I would assume so, if you are still at your job) If so, how did you find the 2%, and what is the 2% for you?

Jenn always wanted to be a wife and a mother. Now that she is both, and does fantastically at both I might add, it's not entirely what she expected, which I would assume is common for most wives/mothers. Just like any other career, some mothers struggle for the 2% almost daily. So the questions apply to you women and stay at home dads as well.

Go!

An Experiment

There are many good people doing many great things around the world. I was thinking today about how we as parents encourage our kids to become one of those people....because Lord knows it doesn't come naturally. After all, the Bubba isn't exactly the model of compassion. Though I'm sure none of you parents have the same experience with your children.

An experiment in compassion and donation popped into my head this afternoon. (Ideas usually take a few weeks to weasel their way through my thick skull...so who knows, this idea could be a few weeks old by now) The Bubba is a little young for this experiment, but if he were older, I'd try it out on him. Usually, when parents attempt to teach their kids about giving, they've already got an idea in mind. Be it sponsoring a child, dropping some money in a donation box, or sending clothes to children out of the country, the parents are usually the seed. Any act of giving is intrinsically valuable and worthwhile, but I'm curious what would happen if we left it up to our children.

If London were a few years older, I would ask him to choose one item that he "owns" and whatever he chooses, will go to someone less fortunate. I wouldn't give him any ideas or suggestions, it could literally be anything. Since children are inherently selfish, he would probably choose something that he would consider to have very little value...like a pencil. But instead of scolding him for not donating his favorite toy, I would commend him on his decision. Why? Because giving never comes easy. Because asking me to save Africans from malaria will, unfortunately, accomplish nothing. But asking me to buy a $5 mosquito net at a local business just might produce results. Mother Teresa is known for her compassion because of a million small things she did over her lifetime, not the one large check she wrote to her local church. The point is, we need to start small. We need to make giving easy for our children by facilitating the act. And if London actually chooses a pencil, I could explain to him that there are actually people around the world, and in our city, who cannot afford the pencils they need for their schooling. We would then, together, investigate the avenues for getting this pencil to a child who desperately needs it. Simple, but it's a start.

Unfortunately, the following is a true statement. I feel better about thinking of ways to help starving children in Africa, than I do about actually helping someone in my community. Why? Because I've been led to believe that it's the big ideas that matter. Our children's lives could be marked by a few extravagant deeds, or by a lifetime of service and compassion.

I'm Travis Avila, and I approved this message

Chuck E. Cheese

Travis here. I think I'm back in the land of the living, after a few grueling weeks of work. I'm going to try and post more frequently this week. Which is great...unless you dislike me and/or think I'm stupid, in which case...it sucks to be you.

Recently, a young family moved in across the street. They have a young girl, about the same age as The Bubba. Her name is Isabella, and she is completely in love with the Bubba. She doesn't know many words...but her parents say she asks for "Boba" all day long. We decided that it was time they went on their first date. I was a little apprehensive because Isabella's mother is Spanish, which means that Isabella is Spanish. (Did you follow that genetics lesson? Email me if you have questions) I was apprehensive because being Spanish means only one thing. Scandalous. Being that it was their first date, and that Isabella moves fast, the parents thought they needed chaperones.

So we accompanied the kiddos to the freak show that is Chuck E. Cheese's. Upon entry, we were greeted by a six foot tall rat, dancing around like an idiot. The Bubba immediately applied the death grip and wouldn't let go of me for anything. He buried his head in my chest as I tried to assure him that everything would be alright. He wasn't buying it, and if I'm honest...neither was I. This place was like a three years old's bad acid trip. Complete over stimulation. After Bubba and I had calmed down, we decided to play a few games. Our biggest accomplishment of the night was that he helped Jenn and I dominate on Skee Ball.

All-in-all, it was a pretty typical night a The Cheese's. The pizza looked like it was starched, in that it didn't bend...and it tasted like cardboard. As you can imagine, I had REALLY weird dreams last night. I would speculate that The Bubba also had some strange dreams, involving a six foot Rat, neon lights, and a kiss from his lady. That's right folks. He got a kiss in at the buzzer. He was going for the lips, but at the last second, Isabella turned and gave him the cheek. She's such a tramp.

Saturday Night Link Love

My sister has gone through more in her twenty-five years than most people will in their entire life. The most amazing thing is...she's doing surprisingly well. From losing her husband to cancer, a child to "the system" and going through her own battle with cancer, Janae has emerged a strong woman...fully capable of anything life can throw at her. She has recently finished school, and is getting started on a few business ventures. Do me a favor and visit her blog. Say hello, and then buy some fruity vitamin stuff here...and buy a plane ticket here. If you need vitamins WHILE traveling...she is going to blow your mind.

For my friend Simon

I have a new friend. His name is Simon Jones. He was born across the pond. His wife, Brooke, is an amazing hair stylist and salon owner. We like them a lot. And in honor of them, I would like to post the top ten things I am thankful the British invented.

1. Disc Brakes.
2. Fax machine (this one fascinates me)
3. Steam Locomotives
4. Penicillin
5. Rubber bands (I mean come on, Genius!)
6. Steel Production
7. Toilet Paper (much better than your hands!)
8. Vacuum Cleaners (have you seen what Dyson puts out....unreal!)
9. Gas masks (in the times we are living in, this might be handy)

But my all time favorite thing that the Brits have come up with is.......(drum roll)

That's right. Bob the Builder. It is my life right now, and I embrace it. We love Bob the Builder.

Thanks Simon.

Jenn and Bubba

I Owe You For 1.6 Gallons of Water

There are two things I do every day that are at constant odds with each other.

Drink and Drive

Now, before everyone gets all postal on me, I should tell you that I'm talking about coffee and water, not the other stuff. While visiting doctors and patients, I always have a beverage in my vehicle. Problem is...the more you drink, the more you have to urinate. It's a vicious equation.

Contrary to popular belief, guys CANNOT just urinate anywhere. Well, I mean...technically we can, but it's frowned upon. This leads us to seek out traditional establishments, just like you women. Okay, now that we're all on the same playing field, we can continue.

Most establishments have a "No Purchase, No Potty" policy, which sort of puts me in a bind...narrowing my options. I can buy something, seek out another establishment that doesn't have (or doesn't enforce) the policy, or there's the dreaded wetting of the pants. As much as I'd like another "Social Dilemma" post, I've tried to avoid the third option at all costs. But I don't want to buy something either, because buying a bottle of water is what got me into this situation in the first place. This leaves finding another establishment. In my seven months at the new job, I've pretty much nailed down "The Best Places to Potty on the Central Coast." They are:

Target
Any supermarket
My house (you are ALL welcome to use my restroom. beware though, the toilet seat is alive...more on that later)

The most desirable outcome of any bathroom trip, is that it is successfully completed as a Covert-Op. Even in establishments that don't enforce "the policy," you still want to get in and get out, without anyone getting hurt. Cause when I have to potty, you'd better not get in my way. I'll Judo chop your face. Target and supermarkets are great because you can use the restroom and then maybe take a lap around the place to give the impression that you actually intended to buy something. Even if you don't make a purchase, you can pass it off as their fault. You came to their store and took a look around, right? It's not your fault if they don't have anything you want.

I've never been approached by a store employee asking for reimbursement for 1.6 gallons of water, but that does not mean it never happens. So I'll ask you.

1. Do you frequently use businesses to do your business. If so, which ones do you prefer?

2. Have you ever been confronted by a store employee asking for flush money?

The blogger with the most frequent use of public venues will be awarded the coveted, first ever, 2008 IBS Award. And since we've been talking about restroom issues for the past month here at the Avila Family Blog, I think this post will conclude discussions for a while. Because even I'm getting grossed out.