I am a 28-year old husband, father, oxygen salesman, son, aspiring non-writing writer, friend, and glute master. Typically, at least for most men I know, these things exist mentally independent of one another. I put on my salesman hat at work and my husband hat while speaking with Jenn. Sometimes I get confused and put on my glutemaster hat while leading worship. When that happens, my world goes into a tizzy.
I've heard it said that men go into "buckets." That we are only able to focus on one thing at a time, while women thrive on multi-tasking. I am compelled to believe that this is true because I just spilled my beer on the table while trying to reach for the remote. Whether this is true or not makes no difference at the moment. My point is that all of my hats seem to be converging, heading towards an inevitable collision. I've been asking myself how all of these things relate to one another and what that means for my life. Specifically, how do I pursue what I'm passionate about while doing what is necessary to put food on the table.
I'm sure there are plenty of you out there who share a similar struggle. In talking with a few people I trust, the answers have been very much the same. Basically, they say something to do with seasons of life and responsibility. I can't say that I disagree with them. Obviously God doesn't want me writing full-time at the moment because I'm not writing full-time. But for creative people, creativity is woven into our fabric. Artistic outlets are second only to breath. The most common response is, "Sure, but you can find ways to be creative with what you've been given, right?" Of course I can. But it doesn't satisfy completely. Maybe nothing ever will. Who knows. But recently, I have this insatiable desire to write and be creative, which wars against the knowledge that I can't. At least not right now. Or can I? That's the question. I suppose the answer is that you do what you can when you can.
Truth is, I am more passionate about my family than writing. So for now, I am working hard, trying to give us the best life possible. I can't stop writing though, and no one expects me to. I just wish the two were a little more friendly in their interactions.
-Trav
4 comments:
I'm glad to see you writing here again. I thought that maybe since I followed most peoples cues and didn't plead with you to write that you were never coming back.
I read an article this week by Dorothy Sayers about work, production, and consumption that I thought was really interesting. Our world is interesting in that you can work and make money at something you really don't want to do and yet the thing you want to do and are good at nobody wants to pay you for. Yet I wonder how much of what we want to do and what we feel we are good at is our own selfish desires and how much of it is God's gifting and plans to use us for His glory.
Anyway, how was that for a long comment to say that I'm glad your blogging again?
Danny
Glad to see you writing again, here at least. I know Billy struggles with the Creative vs. Feeding the family issue too. I don't know where the happy medium is but I hope and pray that you both will find something that satisfies your creative and family man sides!
I know Trav. I've cried everyday for 14 years.
Deb
yeah. I know that feeling, too. :)
I'm hoping the "seasons of life" theory is a reality.
Post a Comment